I was up late at night and a million things were rushing through my head, and for some reason I started thinking about death and how it scares me, and then I started thinking of all my other fears…
Now, like most, I’m living with fears. A fear of never being good enough within myself, and within society. A fear of rejection, which has postponed countless efforts of trying. A fear of becoming a failure. A fear of never making my family proud. A fear of never living up to expectations. I’m 5’8, yet they’re still out of reach. A fear that I may never truly find happiness, no matter how far I search. A fear that I may never find myself. A fear that I may never find my worth. A fear that I may never be happy with my life. A fear of the unknown. A fear of What If! This fear festers inside, feeding its appetite. What fears me the most however, is that I may die, before I even get the chance to live.
Life is short. I have witnessed quite a few youths pass away, and being young myself, that scares the absolute hell out of me, because they didn’t get a chance to reach their full potential in life, and unfortunately it was cut short. I’ve talked to elderly men and women about their lives and how it panned out. All the responses were preaching the same message. Enjoy life while you can because it happens so fast. Even though I’m still considered to be young, I’ve been looking back on my years, and it amazed me how quickly they went by. Even as I’m writing this we’re in March of 2017. Just yesterday it felt like 2012. I don’t want to live my life with the fear of what if! From this day forth, I’ll be making the most of everyday, enjoying all the little things that life has to offer, because you never know when it will your last. I know it sounds cliché, however it’s true!